q u e e r l y * w r i t t e n

to the bf- my partner, my lover, my best friend. i love you!

i hate mondays with a passion, and today hasn’t disappointed me at all. typical shit at work to deal with, plus life, and then we went to weigh in at lunch, and i lost NO weight this week! the bf at least lost two pounds, but i’ve worked my ass off (all except for eating too much saturday) and i didn’t lose a fucking ounce! i’ve been lifting weights, and muscle weighs more than fat, but i doubt i can blame it on that… dunno, i’m just pissed right now at several things, and i guess i just need to get over it all. but my ass will be at the gym tonight after the tupperware rally for sure.

(all images can be found in gallery)

congratulations to jay and joey on their recent marriage! jay and joey are our friends from new orleans, who relocated to san francisco after katrina. their long-time relationship was finally legalized in california last month. congrats, and can’t wait to see you guys next month!!

yesterday was our week 10 weigh- in, and i had lost another six pounds, and the bf another 5! i’ve now lost a total of 49 pounds and he’s lost 40.5! we are still going to the gym at least 4-5 times a week, and we’ve added weights to our cardio. we also do weighted crunches and inverted situps… gonna have a 6-pack and guns when i’m done here. the transformation astounds even me when i look in the mirror and see how far i’ve come in such a relatively short time. but this is it for the long haul. i’m never gonna be called “big daddy” or “big man” again!!!

Are you a man who loves
And cherishes
And cares for me?
Is that you? Is that you?
Is that you? yeah…
Are you a guard in a prison
Maximum security?
Is that you? Is that you?
Is that you? yea…
Do we stay home all the time
Cuz you want me to yourself?
Is that you? Is that you?
Is that you? yeah…
Or am I locked away
Out of fear that i’d find
Someone else
Is that you? Is that you?
yea…

Well, I don’t like
Living under your spotlight
Just because you think
I might find somebody worthy
Oh, I don’t like
Living under your spotlight
Baby, if you treat me right
You won’t have to worry

is this a relationship
Fulfilling your needs
As well as mine
Is that you? Is that you?
Is that you? yeah…
Or is this just my sentence
Am I doing time?
Is that you? Is that you?
Is that you? yeah…
If this is love
Real, real love
Then I’m staying no doubt
Is that you? Is that you?
Is that you? yeah…
But if I’m just a love prisoner
Then I’m busting out
Is that you? Is that you?
yeah…

Oh, you oughta be
Ashamed of yourself
What the hell
Do you think you’re doing?
Loving me, loving me
So wrong
Baby, all I do is try
To show you
That you’re my
One and only guy
No matter
Who may come along
Open your eyes
Cuz baby, I don’t lie

so, friday night was the miss gay capital city pageant at splash in baton rouge, and since i’ve lost so much weight, i wanted to get something new to wear. i picked out a couple pair of shorts, in a size 36 and 38, and went into the dressing room. i slipped the first pair on, and they were so loose they almost just fell off, so i thought “woohoo, i put on the 38, so the 36 should fit!” wrong!! those were the size 36! i bought a pair of polo shorts in a fucking size 34!!!! now remember, i was just in a size 44 about three months ago. needless to say, i was in a really great mood after that!

the pageant was fun. it’s really cool to see people who haven’t seen you in a while, and the first thing they do is comment on how much weight you’ve lost and how good you look. it makes it all worth while.

we didn’t get in bed til like 3:30 saturday morning, so we slept late, then went to hammond to give a tupperware party.

sunday, unify hammond had a softball and swimming outing at wandaland. we didn’t play much softball, but we stayed in the river for about six hours- the last 2 or 3 with everyone pretty much nekkid! LOL! i posted a few pictures earlier in the week, but i’ll get the whole gallery up soon. met some cool people- a lesbian couple from albany, and a hot boy/daddy couple from baton rouge. dunno who was hotter, the 41y/o or the 18y/o! you’ll see lots of them in the gallery!

had a tupperware party monday night, and last night all the family met at ryan’s for the son’s 18th birthday party. that was fun…

on the tickfaw river at wandaland in killian… more photos soon.

click to enlarge- NUDITY WARNING!

(all images can be found in gallery)

monday was our 8-week weigh-in, and i lost another 4.5 pounds for an 8 week total of 43 pounds! the bf lost another 3.5 pounds for a total of 35.5! hard to believe, but that goal of a 100 pound loss that i didn’t even say out loud, now seems so much more attainable. i’m almost half-way there already!!! and with every ounce i lose, and every time i pass on a coke or a slice of greasy pizza, or drive by mcdonald’s or burger king without even considering stopping… just makes my resolve that much stronger that this time is the one for me. it’s not a diet for me anymore, it’s just my lifestyle. i’m not fat, and i refuse to act and eat like a fat person. i am in control now!!

click to enlarge- NUDITY WARNING!

click to enlarge- NUDITY WARNING!

(all images can be found in gallery)

my son turned 18 today. hard to believe he’s all grown up! we’re taking him and a friend to new orleans tonight to celebrate on bourbon street… should be quite an experience!

he may be a man now, but he’ll always be my baby.

happy birthday, i love you!!